Learning to risk it all

I don't know how to say exactly how I feel
And I can't begin to tell you what Your love has meant
I'm lost for words

Is there a way to show the passion in my heart
Can I express how truly great I think You are
My dearest friend

Lord, this is my desire
To pour my love on You

Like oil upon Your feet
Like wine for You to drink
Like water from my heart
I'll pour my love on You

If praise is like perfume
I'll lavish mine on You
Till every drop is gone
I'll pour my love on You

-- "Pour My Love on You" by Phillips, Craig & Dean

I have over 1,000 songs on my computer, and a couple of hundred in my portable MP3 player. There are some songs that I always seem to skip through to get to my favourites. "Pour My Love on You" is one of those songs, and even though I must have heard it many times before, I only truly listened today.

It sounds so simple, to lay everything at Jesus' feet the way Mary did, but I often find myself holding back the few drops in that bottle. I don't know why, but I do it anyway, for some inexplicable need to claim something as my own: my tears, my sorrow, my pain, my insecurities, my fears. But as I was thinking about that -- trying to find a way to explain my unreason -- God dropped His word into my heart: "Abide in Me, and I in you..." (John 15:4). If I was afraid to lose myself in Him, God assures me that He gave it all to lose Himself in me. And He did it first. He's been there, done that, and He knows that it isn't easy. As much as I am afraid to trust Someone so unconditionally, to belong to Someone so entirely, He assures me that He has chosen to belong to me. Entirely and unconditionally.