List of a different kind

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about its own things. Sufficient for the day is its own trouble."

-- Matthew 6:33-34 (NKJV)

"But I will hope continually,
And will praise You yet more and more.
My mouth will tell of Your righteousness
And Your salvation all the day,
For I do not know their limits."

-- Psalm 71:14-15 (NKJV)

I make lists.

Every day, I make a list of the things I have to do. Sometimes I finish them all, other times I don't. But I make them anyway -- my "To Do" lists.

Now and then, when I'm overwhelmed by how much I have on my plate, I sit down and draw up a prayer list -- things to pray for, when I can do nothing else; there are so many things that I actually have to write them out. I pray for people who I cannot help, I pray for the courage that I lack, I pray for the windows that are stuck fast to be opened; things that are ridiculously huge, things that I've failed at on my own, things that make my heart ache.

Tonight, as I revisited the oldest list of the lot, my tears smudged the ink on the pages, as I ticked off the items one by one -- prayers answered, requests fulfilled, despite how bleak and impossible it may have seemed when they were penned, and despite me having forgotten half of what I wrote.

And I realised that it's true: to pursue anything else -- no matter how noble it may seem -- is all a chasing after the wind.

I looked back at the items on the list, and I realised that the one thing they all had in common: I didn't do anything. I didn't do anything but pray... and put the check beside it afterwards. My "Nothing for me To Do" list.

***

It was a beautiful letdown
The day I knew
That all the riches this world had to offer me
Would never do

It was a beautiful letdown
When You found me here
For once in a rare blue moon
I see everything clear

-- "The Beautiful Letdown" by Switchfoot